Second Time Around

Amber liquid splashing,
hastily poured and unmindful of where it goes,
as long as it ends with two things-
burning down your throat as it alleviates you from thought.

Be mindful of the bottom.

You seem to think that happiness,
fleeting or full,
is found at the end of a wine bottle,
and another, and another.

I am drowning in your sorrow.

Loving you was not enough,
you had to constantly numb yourself,
from stupid and unnecessary pain,
leaving others (me) to clean you up in your dripping wake.

You will not find happiness with a bottle.

Empty promises were given time and time again,
I forgave you the blackouts,
I forgave you for being a sobbing mess,
but I still cannot forgive you for telling me I am worthless.

Be mindful of the bottom.

With every drop that you consumed,
you sought to gain happiness and forgetfulness,
and instead every gulp represents someone that despises you now.
I'm sorry to say that I am still one of them.

Fuck You.

I Will Never Believe In Anything Again

Such a pretty face.
That is all I ever hear,
paired with a heavy heart,
facing the mirror--
I hope it swallows me up.
Pinch here and another there,
maybe if I grab hard enough,
the flaws will shrink.
My eyes have deviated
"from what makes me beautful"
and is instead comparing,
constantly comparing,
myself to all the girls I am surrounded by.
How can I compete?
I constantly batter myself,
day and night,
telling myself I will change.
All I am left with is-
an emaciated self worth
and an obese self image-
besides the hatred I have for myself.
The tears do not seem to end,
as I want my mind to lie to me,
in a way that my eyes cannot.

Nails For Breakfast, Tacks For Snacks

The night is too harsh,
The stars have gone dark,
Shadows and monsters are marked,
There is nothing left but to run away,
Footsteps fade, they just can't stay,
All the creepy things have come out to play.

Blurb

Singing along to the sounds of the city,
Trying to make the world so much clearer,
It does not really matter if no one can hear,
I am drowning myself with sober thinking.

I'm Lost In A Sea Of Anonymity

Hands shoved deep in your pockets,

Shoulders hunched close for warmth,

Ripped shoes,

Not for fashion mind you,

But warn in from constant use,

They muffle the sounds of the wind.

Your shadow is cast--

Across the sidewalk you are stretched

by the streetlights above you.

Looking for purpose in a velvet night,

Devoid of color scheme

as your shadow is devoid of you.

Cloaked by the disguise of normalcy,

You realize that this is your chance

to be more than the place you are...

But you are gone--

Lost in a sea,

of anonymity.

You're In Love With Love and I'm In Love With You

I am all tied up with words,
My wit is lost in a stumbling lisp,
Rose blush at the mistakes I've made,
I can't help embarrassing myself.
I'm failing and you're my weakness,
To you I'm frequently exposed
to who I am really am:
A beating heart in a body of lies.

With Or Without You

Grab your kleenex and wipe your tears,
Wave goodbye to your firstborn,
Your middle child or your baby.
You might find this suggestion suggestive:
But keep sending your children to war,
We have too many people here anyway.
With them gone you may find more room
in restaurants and malls, colleges and churches,
backlit alleys or bright lit stages.
Finally we have the oxygen we crave,
Now that there are those dying
for an unknown cause and a president who looks
like a baboon.
You may be lucky to get them back whole
in a coffin, if not you can hope that they have
a patch of grass above their unmarked grave.
Send them your prayers and hope,
Maybe they will not fall on deaf ears,
Though the pleas to come home do.